What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

HELLO

{RING} {RING}

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Sure no problem officer.

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

Why do men date women they are not really interested in?

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

After a few moments he returns.

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

Why do people hate fat people so much, even people who aren't exactly supermodels themselves? It seems like such a deep, passionate hatred, like they're offended by fat people just existing. Fat people didn't do anything to them, so why hate them?

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

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Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

To those people in the world who have access to universal healthcare, what experiences could you share with Americans in order for us to understand how it affects your life (positively or negatively)?

Yes sir it is.

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.